How I’ve Gotten a Free Seat for My Lap Infant on a Flight

Before my first flight with my son, I had no idea that a lap infant could potentially end up with an empty seat for free.

I learned about it in the mom group I joined when my son was about six weeks old. I mentioned that I was flying to the East Coast to visit family for the holidays, and another mom gave me a tip: If you’re traveling with a lap infant, bring your car seat to the gate and politely ask the gate agent whether there are any empty seats on the flight. If there are, they may let you bring your baby’s car seat onboard and move you next to the open seat.

I tried it. It worked. Since then, I’ve asked about five times and gotten lucky twice. So no, this is absolutely not guaranteed. But I now tell every mom flying with a lap infant the same thing: Ask. The worst they can say is no.

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How to Ask for an Empty Seat for Your Lap Infant

If I’m hoping to use an empty seat, I don’t check my car seat before security or at the ticket counter. I bring it all the way to the gate. If I’m traveling with my Doona, this is especially easy because I can use it as my stroller through the airport and then, if permitted, bring it onboard as a car seat.

Once a gate agent is available, I approach them and politely say something along the lines of:

“I know the flight is probably full, but in the off chance there’s an open seat, would it be possible to move us next to it and bring my car seat onboard?”

That’s it. Be nice, ask once and understand that they may not know the answer yet.

On one flight, the gate agent knew there would be empty seats and moved me right away. Another time, they asked me to wait because there were standby passengers. As boarding got closer, they called me back up and told me an empty seat was available.

An Empty Seat Is Never Guaranteed

This is the most important part of this tip: Your lap infant is not entitled to that empty seat.

The FAA encourages airlines to allow empty seats to accommodate approved child restraint systems (aka car seats), but airlines are not required to let a non-ticketed child occupy one. Buying your baby a ticket is the only way to guarantee that you can use a child restraint system for them onboard.

I’ve even had a flight where a gate agent moved me next to an empty seat but still wouldn't allow me to bring my car seat onboard. Airline policies and individual circumstances can vary, which is why I always treat the empty seat as a bonus rather than something I expect.

If the gate agent says no, my advice is simple: Say thank you and move on. Gate-check the car seat or stroller as planned. Don’t try to go around the gate agent because you happen to notice an empty seat later. You don’t know why that seat is empty or whether someone else will ultimately be assigned to it.

Why Having the Extra Seat Is So Helpful

Having a separate seat for your baby can make a flight a million times easier, especially on a red-eye or any flight when your baby is likely to sleep.

Instead of holding your baby for hours, you have a familiar, secure place to put them. That’s also why, if it’s financially doable, I recommend purchasing your baby their own seat from the beginning. Plane tickets are expensive, though, and I completely understand why families choose to travel with a lap infant.

If you’re going to have your baby on your lap anyway, you lose nothing by asking whether an empty seat is available.

Make Sure Your Car Seat Is Approved for Air Travel

Not every car seat can automatically be used on an airplane. Before traveling, check the label and manufacturer’s instructions to make sure your child restraint is approved for aircraft use.

The FAA says an approved car seat should generally be placed in a window seat so it doesn’t block another passenger’s path to the aisle, although other placements may be permitted depending on the seating configuration and airline. Car seats also cannot be used in exit rows.

Always follow the airline, flight crew and car-seat manufacturer’s instructions for your specific flight. The Doona is our favorite!

One More Tip: Choose Your Family’s Seats Ahead of Time

I don’t personally use the strategy of booking an aisle and window seat and hoping no one takes the middle. When I’m traveling with kids, I’d rather know we’re sitting together.

I also avoid basic economy fares that don’t allow me to choose seats when traveling with my children. If I book through a third party or use points, I take the airline confirmation number and go directly to the airline’s website or app to confirm our actual seat assignments. I’ve been burned by this before, and it’s unnecessary stress when you’re already flying with a baby.

Then, if an extra seat happens to open up at the gate, great. I can ask whether we can be moved.

The Bottom Line

Don’t be embarrassed to walk up to the gate agent and ask. You’re not demanding a free seat or trying to get around the rules. You’re simply asking whether an otherwise empty seat is available for your lap infant and whether you’re allowed to use your approved car seat onboard.

Be friendly. Be kind. And if the answer is no, you’re exactly where you started. But if the answer is yes? It could make your flight a whole lot easier.

FAQs About Getting an Empty Seat for a Lap Infant

Can a lap infant get a free seat on a plane?

Sometimes, but it is not guaranteed. If there is an unoccupied seat, an airline may allow you to use it for your lap infant and approved car seat. However, airlines are not required to provide a free seat to a lap infant. The only way to guarantee your baby has their own seat is to purchase one.

How do I ask for an empty seat for my lap infant?

Bring your approved car seat to the gate and politely ask the gate agent whether there are any empty seats and, if so, whether you can be moved next to one and bring the car seat onboard. They may not know until shortly before boarding because of standby passengers and last-minute seat assignments.

Should I check my baby’s car seat before going through security?

If you want the option of using it onboard in an available seat, don’t check it at the ticket counter. Bring it to the gate. If you aren’t permitted to bring it onboard, you can follow the airline’s instructions for gate-checking it.

Does a lap infant need an FAA-approved car seat to use an empty airplane seat?

If you’re going to use a car seat onboard a U.S. flight, make sure it is approved for aircraft use and appropriate for your child. Check the car seat’s label and manufacturer’s instructions before traveling.

Where does a baby’s car seat go on an airplane?

A window seat is generally the preferred location because the car seat cannot block another passenger’s access to the aisle. Airlines can determine appropriate locations based on the aircraft and safe operating practices, so always follow the flight crew’s instructions.

Is buying a separate airplane seat for my baby worth it?

In my experience, yes, if it fits your budget. Having a dedicated seat and approved car seat gives your baby a secure, familiar place to sit and can make longer flights and red-eyes significantly easier. It’s also the only way to guarantee you’ll be able to use the car seat onboard.

What are your must-have travel products when traveling with kids?

Here is a list of our favorite products that we have personally used and loved! And here is a more in depth article about what I actually bring when flying with a baby.

If you plan on traveling with your baby, check out more tips in our travel resources section and also download our free traveling with a baby guide!