Flying With a Baby or Toddler: 11 Tips From a Flight Attendant of 50 Years

Flying with a baby or toddler can make even an experienced traveler question everything. Should you pre-board? Where do you change a diaper on the plane? Can a flight attendant warm a bottle? What should you do if your baby cries the entire flight?

I’ve taken more than 20 flights with my kids, but I also have a resource most parents don’t: my mom has been a flight attendant for 50 years. So I asked her what she wishes parents knew before flying with babies and young kids, including the mistakes she sees most often and the things that can actually make a flight easier.

Her biggest message was surprisingly reassuring. Parents have been flying with babies forever. Prepare for what you can, ask for help when you need it and try not to spend the entire flight worrying about what everyone around you is thinking.

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1. Try Not to Stress About Your Baby Crying on the Plane

The first thing I asked my mom was what she would tell a nervous parent getting on a plane with a baby. Her answer: “You’re not the first person to bring a baby on a plane, and you won’t be the last.”

After 50 years of watching families fly, she has seen pretty much everything. Babies cry, toddlers have meltdowns, parents get stressed and flights eventually land. We can spend so much energy worrying about whether everyone around us is annoyed, but most of those people will get off the plane and never think about us again.

Her other advice? If you’re traveling alone, don’t be afraid to ask for help when you genuinely need it. Flight attendants have seen plenty of parents struggle to juggle a baby, bags and everything else that comes with traveling with kids.

2. Decide Whether Pre-Boarding Actually Helps Your Family

Should families with young children pre-board? According to my mom, it depends. If you’re traveling with another adult, one of her favorite strategies is having one person board early with the bags while the other stays in the terminal with the kids.

The first parent can get the bags put away and the seats organized without simultaneously trying to entertain a toddler. Then the other parent and kids can board closer to departure. Boarding 30 or 40 minutes early can essentially add another 30 or 40 minutes to the amount of time your toddler has to sit on the airplane.

If you’re flying alone with a baby, however, pre-boarding may be incredibly helpful because it gives you extra time to get everything organized without feeling rushed. There isn't one right answer. Choose what makes boarding easiest for your particular child and travel situation.

3. Bring Entertainment and Headphones

One of the biggest mistakes my mom sees is parents getting on a flight without enough to keep their kids occupied. You don't need elaborate airplane toys. A few inexpensive activity books, stickers, snacks or something your child hasn't seen before can go a long way. And yes, electronics absolutely count.

If you're bringing an iPad or tablet, make sure you also bring headphones. Once your child is entertained, remember that you're still sharing a small space with a lot of people. Occasionally check whether your toddler is kicking the seat, repeatedly opening the tray table or reaching into someone else's space. You don't have to spend the entire flight obsessing over your child's behavior, but a little awareness goes a long way.

4. Don't Assume the Plane Will Have Baby Supplies

Flight attendants can help with plenty of things, but don't board expecting them to have supplies you forgot. They can usually provide water and may be able to give you hot water so you can prepare or warm a bottle yourself, but you shouldn't count on them being able to warm a bottle for you or ensure that it reaches the right temperature.

You also shouldn't expect the plane to have diapers, formula or even the type of milk your child drinks. My mom's rule is simple: “The more prepared you are, the more we can assist you.”

Fill your water bottle before boarding, keep feeding supplies accessible rather than buried in the overhead bin and bring extra diapers, food and formula. Then, if you genuinely need something, ask.

5. Find the Airplane Changing Table Before You Need It

Yes, you can usually change your baby's diaper on an airplane. Many airplane bathrooms have a fold-down changing table, but not necessarily every bathroom on the plane. On larger aircraft, you may also find that one bathroom has a little more room than another.

If you're traveling with another adult, have someone check which bathroom has the changing table before you desperately need it. Figuring this out is much easier before your baby has the blowout of the century.

Bring your own changing mat, wipes and small plastic bags for dirty diapers or clothing. And please use the bathroom rather than changing a poopy diaper at your seat.

6. Give Babies Something to Suck or Swallow During Takeoff and Landing

Babies and toddlers don't know how to intentionally pop their ears when cabin pressure changes, so swallowing can help. For a baby, that could mean nursing, taking a bottle or sucking on a pacifier. For an older toddler, a drink or age-appropriate snack may help.

For my toddler, I've also found that a lollipop can be incredibly helpful. It gives him something to focus on while we're taking off and often helps him settle into whatever we're doing next.

7. Consider the Window Seat When Flying With a Baby

Window or aisle with a baby? My mom's answer surprised me: “The window seat is golden.” Her biggest reason is that you control the window shade.

If you're trying to get your baby to nap, you can make your area darker and keep direct sunlight out of your baby's eyes. For a toddler, looking out the window can also provide some built-in entertainment.

The downside is obvious. You'll have to climb past someone when you need the bathroom. But if sleep is a priority, having control over the window can be surprisingly useful.

8. Take the Seatbelt Sign Seriously

If your baby is crying, your instinct may be to stand up and walk the aisle or bounce them. But if the seatbelt sign is on and a flight attendant asks you to sit down, listen. Unexpected turbulence can happen quickly.

If something urgent is happening, such as your toddler desperately needing the bathroom, talk to a flight attendant rather than assuming the rule doesn't apply to you. One theme came up repeatedly when I talked to my mom: communicate. Flight attendants understand that you're traveling with a little person whose needs don't always happen at convenient times, so ask what your options are.

9. Download the Airline's App Before Your Flight

This was one of my mom's most practical tips, especially when you're worried about delays or cancellations. Download your airline's app before your trip and make sure your reservation is connected to it.

If your flight is delayed, canceled or you miss a connection, the app may show updated flight information or rebooking options before you even get off the plane. That's much easier than getting into a long customer-service line with an overtired baby or toddler.

10. Pack an Extra Outfit for Your Baby AND Yourself

Most parents remember an extra onesie, but we forget ourselves. Babies spit up, bottles leak, blowouts happen and toddlers somehow get food on parts of your body that weren't anywhere near the food.

Put at least an extra shirt for yourself somewhere accessible in your carry-on or diaper bag. I also recommend keeping plastic bags or wet bags handy so you have somewhere to put dirty clothes. It's one of those things you probably won't need until the flight when you're extremely happy you packed it.

11. Take the Trip

Finally, I asked my mom what she would tell a parent staring at the “book flight” button and wondering whether traveling with a baby is actually worth the stress. Her answer was immediate: “It's always worth it.”

You're dealing with a few hours of inconvenience to get somewhere. Maybe you're going on vacation, visiting grandparents or introducing your baby to family members who haven't met them yet.

I've taken more than 20 flights with my kids, and this is probably the piece of her advice I've internalized the most. Before trips, I've worried about everything. Will the baby sleep? Will my toddler melt down? Did I pack enough? Are we completely insane for doing this? Then we arrive, and I'm always glad we went.

The flight is temporary. The trip is the reason you're doing it.

Quick Flight Attendant Tips for Flying With a Baby

If you're short on time, here's the advice I'd remember:

• Decide whether pre-boarding actually helps your child.

• Bring plenty of snacks and entertainment.

• Pack headphones if you're bringing a tablet.

• Don't count on the airplane having diapers, formula or milk.

• Find the bathroom with a changing table before you need it.

• Keep feeding and diaper supplies somewhere you can easily reach.

• Consider a window seat if you're hoping your baby will nap.

• Download your airline's app before leaving home.

• Pack extra clothes for your baby and yourself.

• Ask flight attendants for help when you need it.

• Most importantly, don't let fear of the flight keep you from taking the trip.

FAQs About Flying With a Baby

Can flight attendants warm a baby bottle?

You shouldn't count on a flight attendant warming a bottle for you. They may be able to provide hot water that you can use to prepare or warm a bottle yourself, but it's best to board prepared to handle your baby's feeding needs.

Do airplanes have changing tables?

Many airplanes have fold-down changing tables in at least one bathroom, although the setup varies by aircraft. If possible, find out which bathroom has one before you need to change your baby.

Should you pre-board when flying with a baby?

It depends on your situation. If you're flying alone, pre-boarding can give you extra time to get organized. If you're traveling with another adult and a busy toddler, consider having one adult board early with the bags while the other waits with the child until closer to departure.

Is a window or aisle seat better when flying with a baby?

There are advantages to both, but a window seat lets you control the shade, which can be helpful if you're trying to get your baby to nap. An aisle seat makes bathroom trips easier, so consider which matters more for your flight.

What should I pack in my diaper bag for a flight?

At minimum, bring more diapers and wipes than you expect to need, feeding supplies, extra baby clothes, an extra shirt for yourself, plastic or wet bags, snacks, entertainment and any medications or essentials you wouldn't want to be separated from.

What if my baby cries on the plane?

Do what you can to comfort your baby, but remember that babies are allowed to exist in public spaces, including airplanes. As my mom reminded me after 50 years as a flight attendant, you're not the first parent to fly with a crying baby, and you won't be the last.

More Help Flying With a Baby

Flying with kids gets much easier when you know what to expect. If you're planning an upcoming trip, check out my Traveling With a Baby Guide, where I've put together the practical tips I've learned from taking more than 20 flights with my kids, from what to pack to getting through the airport and surviving the actual flight.

You can also explore my other Mom 411 travel articles for more real-life tips on flying with babies and toddlers.